Why Plan? July 25, 2008
Posted by selfworks in Career and Work, Confidence, Happiness and Success, Money and Prosperity.Tags: business plan, outcomes, planning, written plans
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More years ago than I care to think about, before becoming self-employed, I made a huge mistake. A much older and wiser friend took me aside and said,
“Do make sure you make yourself a business plan, won’t you?”
Being quite young at the time, pretty innumerate, and utterly unsure of what the heck I would put in such a plan anyway, I ignored his advice. After all, I knew in my head what I planned to do, didn’t I?
And that mistake probably cost me thousands (as well incalcuble wasted hours).
But it isn’t just businesses that can benefit from plans (and yes, I mean written ones). We all can.
The real question, though, is, “Why?”. For it can often feel that,”everything is all planned out” if you’ve mulled everything over mentally for the umpteenth time. Yet the statistics for success of planning over failure to plan in writing, are hackneyed and too oft-quoted.
For me, and the people I assist, it seems that plans, however well-visualised, only become “real”, when they’re written-down. Almost literally, they only make it into form in the world when they appear, in black-and-white. (Or indeed, any other more appealing colour combination).
Think about the difference between acknowledging inwardly to yourself that you “meant to have made 10 new contacts” by the end of July, for example, and knowing that you haven’t made that same (but written) target? The two scenarios would feel different, wouldn’t they? In the first case, more people would be able to shrug off any failure to act, with some neat verbal justification. In the second, the written deadline would be an unassailable reminder that they had once meant to act. Once written, a plan acts a a firm intention, rather than an unexpressed possibility.
Now of course it’s a fine line between getting the benefit of such a plan, and feeling stressed by it, to the extent that it becomes another unwelcome, “to-do” list. But a simple, clear plan can help keep you focused on days when focus might otherwise go astray-and leave you feeling amazed at how much, sometimes without realising it, you’ve achieved at the end of each day/week/month/year.
And yes, in case you were wondering-I do now make (and stick to!) written plans of all kinds. Why? Because they work!
Hope this helps.
How *Not* to Set Goals, by the G8 July 9, 2008
Posted by selfworks in Uncategorized.Tags: G8, goal-setting, goals, outcomes
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Yes, I know, it’s a negative title. But the G8 have really excelled themselves in demonstrating how much better we can all do in setting outcomes thean them, in their latest climate change statement.
The statement, if you’re looking for light bedtime reading 
is here:
http://www.herald-review.com/articles/2008/07/06/columnists/hawbaker/1033853.txt
On the plus side, it’s written down. On the minus side, see how many better ways of outcome suggesting you could suggest to them, if asked. My first ten ideas are given below (but there are probably many more).
Ideas
1. Make the outcome as specific and tangible as possible (not just, eg, “work together on mitigation related technology strategies*)
*2. Put the outcome in the clearest and simplest possible terms.
3. State what everyone will see, hear and feel when the outcome is reached.
4. Set down firm targets for every action (not just vague and hopeful references to 2012).
5. State who is to be responsible for each action, and to whom, to ensure maximum accountability.
6. As far apossible, state how an outcome is to be reached, even if only in overview, or via staging post markers in time.
7. Divide the problem into small, manageable measurable steps. (Rather than saying, “Climate change is one of the great global challenges of our time” to depress yourself before you start with the scale of the task, and then failing to work out the tiny steps that can be taken this week, this month, and this year).
8. Make major decisions now (or at least as soon as you have the info to do so), rather than leaving them to, say, 2009, or 2012 , in order save the emotional energy that procrastination wastes, and better-prepare yourself for each new twist and turn in the road. If you really can’t make a decision yet, state the info you need in order to make the decision, and give yourself a deadline by which to find it.
9. If agreements on goals and outcomes involve others, get their genuine buy-in by listening to, and addressing the emotional concerns driving their requests (eg. security, status). The alternative (ie wasting time finding forms of words that please everyone, but achieve nothing) doesn’t bear thinking about.
10. Believe you can reach the outcome, and really want the change. (Nothing in the document suggests it, but maybe I’m feeling jaundiced today…Far be it from me to suggest that another set of politicians is pushing problems into a not-so-blue yonder, in which they are out of office and unaccountable).
And I’m sure the list goes on. Please do leave a comment when you spot other points I’ve missed.
So there you have it. Whoever said that politicians were useless? Look how helpful they’ve been to us here. Whatever happens to the world, you can be sure, if you’re even reading this post, that you’re 100% better at setting goals and outcomes than our esteemed leaders.
More soon
Clare
When Goal Setting *Doesn’t* Work March 19, 2008
Posted by selfworks in Uncategorized.Tags: goal-setting, learning, outcomes, successful
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Why, many of us wonder, do some people’s goal-setting sessions seem to work for them first time, whilst other people can’t seem to get the outcome they want.
It’s a topic I’ve talked about more than once on this blog, and in conjunction with many of the more popular explanations of this phenomenon.
But talk of “letting go of expectations, “clarity,” or even, “universal timing versus personal timing” are of little use if you’re knashing your teeth and wondering why X bod over there has been graced with their desired outcome, and you haven’t.
So here’s a fresh thought. Imagine for a moment that the popular metaphor of life being a school (or a place of constant learning, if you prefer) is actually true. And imagine further that the very wisest part of yourself wouldn’t actually be happy to proceed into new learning until the old were complete.
Now take that “learning” frame, and place it over the situation you still have, and the outcome you’ve yet to attain. With this new framework, the question becomes, “What is it that this situation still has to teach me?”
Doesn’t that make goal-setting seem like rather a different scenario, where your outcome is just the certificate, rather than the course? (It’s certainly been working for me like that recently. If in doubt, give it a go).
Hope this helps.
More soon
Clare
Influence with Integrity January 17, 2008
Posted by selfworks in Uncategorized.Tags: communication, get what you want, influence, integrity, outcomes, persuasion
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Someone asked me this week whether it’s really posisble to influence other people with integrity.
I truly believe that it is, and what’s more, that the formula for this magic process is simple too. Ie:
1. Know what you want.
2. Stand in the shoes of the other person to work out what they need, on the most fundamental level that you can.
3. Work out how you getting your desired outcome will or can also fulfil their need.
4. Communicate the result of step 3. to the person in the manner they’ll best understand.
5. Bingo!
Step two of this system virtually guaratees integrity, because it’s extremely hard to stand in someone else’s shoes without at least starting to want the best for them.
And in fact, by influencing others in this way, you’ll be paying 100% more attention to the other person’s needs than you would by follwing any of the other more complex, more covert, and more “cloak-and-dagger” systems on the market.
Hope this helps, and appologies for the sparse blog this week.
More soon
Clare
Too Good to Be True? January 11, 2008
Posted by selfworks in Uncategorized.Tags: "The Secret, beliefs, law_of_attraction, LOA, manifesting, outcomes, partner, personal development, personal development tip, process
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This post is for you if… there’s something you really want in life, but for some reason it isn’t turning up in your experience at the speed of an express train (or an express snail, for that matter) What’s to be done?
Ask yourself this question, and answer it honestly. (No-one will hear the answer but you). Does this prized outcome, a you think about it happening, feel “too good to be true”?
If so, that may very well indicate reason why you haven’t snaffled that outcome (yet). You see, if something feels “too good to be true,” to you, then you don’t yet believe on the deepest level, that you can attain it. If you did believe it, then it would feel like the next logical step, rather than something that’s “too good”. You’d be thinking/feeling/saying things like, “Of course I can be/have/do X. Why wouldn’t I? The now-treasured outcome would be so much a fact that it wouldn’t actually take up so much of your time or thought as it may at present.
As an example, contrast a person who thinks that, say, life with a great partner is “too good to be true,” with the mindeset of someone who is moving in with a great partner tomorrow.
But how do you get there?
The trouble is, the whole matter can seem somewhat “chicken and egg.” You need to feel like something is thoroughly expected, before you really know what it’s like to expect that thing. But if you knew already what the feeling was like, you wouldn’t be needing to set this outcome.
Fortunately, there ar two ways around this. The first is imagination. By imagining what the feeling would be like (helped by visualisation, reading other people’s success stories, etc) you can often foster the new feeling in a creative and enjoyable way.
Which is fine, if you have huge confidence in your imagination.
If you’re a little nervous about relying only on imagination though, and/or want to “top up” those activities with something less nebulous, here’s a process that works, and makes the ideas behind books and films like, “The Secret” a bit more “do-able”.
1. Note how it is you’d like to feel/need to feel to get this outcome.
2. Be aware, as authentically as possible, of how you feel now.
3. Think about the biggest step twoards your outcome, which still feels completely factual and “on the cards” as you can, (Ideally, this should feel as likely as your brushing your teeth tonight). For example, the person seeking a great partner may not be able yet, to feel what that might be like, but they might well be able to feel likely that they could enjoy a chat, within the next few days, with someone who has some of the characteristics they might like in a partner.
From that place, they might move on to feeling what it would be like to meet more people like that, then meet them for longer…and so on, until the final outcome is a “normality” too.
4. And so, as the example suggests, the final step is simply to repeat this process until the feeling you’re aiming for is a solid part of your reality.
Hope this makes sense and is useful-please comment either way!
Clare
"What Do You Really Want?" Part Three June 1, 2007
Posted by selfworks in Happiness and Success, Personal Development (General).Tags: goals, law_of_attraction, LOA, outcomes, personal_development, personal_development_tip
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OK, I know this should have come out yesterday. But I wanted it to give this last part of the time and attention it deserves.
So far, I’ve been on about timescales, and digging down to the truth of what you really want.
“Essence”
This last section’s about “essence”.
“I don’t get it!” you may be saying. “What’s she on about, “essence?” “Isn’t that for cooking, or perfume?”
Well, yes. But in this case, I’m thinking about the essence of what you really want. In other words, what would be your feeling, or internal experience, if you had what you want?
For example, before I met my Long Suffering (but I think happy) Spouse (LSS will be well-known to you if you read this often) I never used to think about how I’d feel in a happy, long-term relationship.
One day, I did start imagining that. And within weeks, I’d met LSS.
The advantages
The advantages of essence go beyond getting clarity about what you want, or being able to attract what you want more easily (powerful though both ideas are).
If you know the essence of what you want, you cna also begin to incorporate it into your life much sooner. This will both stop you from climbing the walls whilst you’re working towards your outcome, and contribute even more to the “attractive power” we’ve just spoken about.
An example of this will probably make the most sense.Take a hypothetical person called John. John has been an accountant for many years, but has always secretly yearned to be a craftsman, crafting beautiful objects in wood. The essence of the actual experience he wants is the emotional feeling and physical sensation of crafting beautiful objects. And even whilst he’s working in an office, he’s free to daydream about what this would be like. More practically, he’s also free to craft actual objects in his spare time.
By doing this, he’ll:
1) Relieve his frustrations at work by experiencing some of what he wants each day, right away.
2) Get more experience, so that when the time comes and he makes a career change, the experience is there.
3) Let others know about this skill, so that they can admire (and perhaps even buy or recommend) his objects and help him to build an internal sense of his new possible role as a master craftsman. And yes, you’ve guessed it….this may well make that role-change happen faster, and more easily.
So…
So there you have it. Three tips on getting what you want that work together in the background, and may often give you (or someone you know) the boost that they need.
Hope this helps.
Have a great weekend.
Clare
